sophisticated love

Good morning/afternoon/evening blog readers. This is an attempt to sound more sophisticated and grown-up and to use precise English to practise for any upcoming examination in the English language.

I have been thinking alot about the upcoming Project Work Oral Presentation, which will commence from 4th-15th of November. It is a very thrilling and enriching experience which i hope to draw much lessons from.

Of course, there is also the looming 'A' level Chinese Examinations, which is on this coming Friday, 3rd of November. I have not prepared with much diligence, due to the distraction of certain computer games such as the Massively-Multiplayer Online Role-playing Game , World of Warcraft.

To say my heart is in this is also an inaccurate statement. How can thou heart be focussed on something when it is lost in some other being? To be smitten, thou knoweth well.



Haha ok this is tough. went abit off tangent in the last sentence .. into .. Shakespearean or something. hahahaha.

OK FINE HOZZY IM A TEENAGER CHEERS.

a nonWoW - related entry

pfft.

It's been a while since i had an entry where i wrote about something else besides WoW and moody stuff. Well, it's been a while since i had anything nice to blog about. Haven't gone for any nice outings. Haven't got set off by anything controversial.

I'm still sick! Dammnnnit. I think my immune system really sucks as i take really long to recover from a sickness when i fall sick. As i'm writing the guys are probably playing their last games of basketball at NY.. argh. I wanna play too.


I was just talking to the sec4s from church today.. and one prevailing trend i saw was that they all loved to talk about how badly they did/will do.

Why???

When i asked about , for example, a science practical.
'Eh how was your _ _ _ practical last week ah? ' (fill in the blank with bio/physics ) (chem is this tuesday)
"Wa very hard la.. i sure do very badly lor! "

Arh.. I don't get this. Does it serve as some kind of encouragement or morale booster to convince yourself that you did badly? This is warped man.
It is one thing to set realistic expectations and say something like:
"Wa very hard la.. probably get a B."
and it's another to say that you will do badly!

Not that i'll expect them to read this given they're mugging their ass off now, but.. maybe telepathically this will be communicated to them. Haha. come on! Have more confidence in yourself! You have studied hard, worked hard, so don't expect to do badly, but expect to do well! A saying that i like : "Always aim for the sky.. so at least if you fail you can reach the clouds"
A more optimistic response to the above question could be:
"Wa very hard la.. but i tried my best. Hopefully got moderation then i can do well =) "

See! Realistic yet positive.

Btw i found this short but interesting article on 'reverse psychology' http://www.keepkidshealthy.com/parenting_tips/discipline/reverse_psychology.html

However don't be confused, the first answer is NOT an example of 'reverse psychology'.
The definition is
"Reverse psychology is the term that describes the outcome where advocacy of one course of action persuades someone to do the opposite. It is basically making virtue out of necessity."

So an example of reverse psychology with reference to the initial question would be me responding to that negative statement : "Ok lor, then go ahead and fail, you never seem to be able to do anything."

HAHA.

Anyway.. so yupyup. Don't be confused. Telling yourself you'll do badly is not reverse psychology'. Be confident! Be positive!!

Btw this was just quite funny to me so i'm gonna quote it from wikipedia:

Reverse psychology occurs several times on The Simpsons, but its appearances are neither common nor uniform enough for it to qualify as a running gag. A good example is in season 3, in an episode entitled Saturdays of Thunder, when Homer -- after reading a passage in Bill Cosby's parental-advice book Fatherhood (book) -- has a "conversation" with his brain:

Homer's Brain: Don't you get it? You've gotta use reverse psychology.

Homer: That sounds too complicated.

Homer's Brain: OK, don't use reverse psychology.

Homer: All right, I will!

Ahh. Sorry if this blog entry had little flow. I was just typing as my brain thought of things to say. Ok cya. Off to dinner.








p.s. - hozzy - is this non-kiddy enough :p

woW

im flying!
























still flying!





















i'm waiting for the train =)























I'm in the train! eek kinda dark

























oops i died. :( i'm a GHOST now. =)

























haha ok that's all i'm posting. WoW is really damn fun. :) :)

wow

yo.

sorry for the .. lacklustre posts recently. been in a mood slump. unexpected events and happenings have led me to feel really down and depressed and SICK.

Anyway.. i found my source of entertainment for the next 2 months:






























AHhh. i feel the power.

World of Warcraft. An online MMORPG (Massive Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game).
It's basically a big world, like Earth lidat. then you go around killing monsters and doing quests for people and gaining level. Very real one, like you make sound in a cave got echoes.. you drink too much beer you can get tipsy and you can't walk straight.. etcetc.

Then cos now it's halloween, so you can go trick-or-treating at inns. Then you'll either get a mask, some candy.. or the innkeeper can turn you into something like a bat or a black cat.


haha damn cute la. you see that small black cat in the centre. That's me!

OK enough talking i'm gonna go login. chowz =)

im ok.

i'm on ok terms with my friend now.

i'm feeling better

i'm playing computer games 10 hours a day


cheers.

sick.

damn the haze.
damn the lack of sleep.

im sick now.

had a bad cough the whole day. this sucks.

OP in 2/3 weeks.

gg to me.

life sucks.

it's 1.45AM now.

i can't sleep.

Have you ever said something you REALLY wished you could take back. Perhaps something great was going on.. and you slipped. You said something that drastically changed the whole situation. That screwed everything up.
That's how i feel right now. SO FCKING SHITTY.

Does anyone know my sorrow? my angst? my pain?


Dear friend,
if you are reading this , which is highly unlikely unless those countless prayers actually do work and lead you here.. you need to know that i feel like shit.
you may think your course of action is the best for everyone, best for me.
Well, no, it sucks.
I feel useless , abandoned, and helpless now.
Surely that was not what you wanted me to feel?
If your gratitute was sincere and real - you would try to make things right instead of trying to avoid them like what you're presently doing. Avoiding your problems never solve anything.
If you dont want to make things right, and you want to leave this friendship hanging like that.. I really can't do anything. i can beg and pray.. but it's really just up to you.
i treasure you alot. i hope you treasure/(d) me too.
-alan.


life sucks.

was staring out of the window at 1.30AM.. taking in the nice view i have from my window.. letting the cool night wind blow through my hair. inhaling the !@$^@!# indonesian haze.
Looking down at the row of cars aligned far below.
Glancing at the sky.. the clear boundless sky.
A long way up.. a long way down.
i'm just stuck in the middle.

Why'd you want to live for.

a great song.



a better question.

prayer. and questions.

Do you believe in prayer?

Is it possible to pray for miracles to happen?

Do prayers work?
When a sick person prays to get well -- does that really work?
If it does -- doesnt it mean that if he doesn't pray he wont get well?

No, i'm not rocked in my faith for God. To God. Whatever the preposition is.
I just haven't received any good answer that satisfied me for the question 'Why do we pray to get well when we fall sick?'


Anyway back to the main question. Do miracles happen because of people praying for them? According to the Bible, they should, shouldn't they? Elijah got a wet bunch of wood to catch fire by praying to God. Gideon prayed to God for a sign of confirmation and God made the fleece/ground wet/dry etc.

So can all who are reading this now help pray for a miracle?

Now here comes the unusual part. Does praying for something you don't know about work?
For example, some parents during their bedtime prayers with children, pray for 'those childrens starving in africa, that they will get some food/nutrition'. Or sometimes we say 'pray for O's, A's, and all others having exams' when we don't know who are 'all others'.

So, it should work right?

Would you mind praying for someone whom you don't know, about something you have no idea about?
It's for a certain person, let's just call that person Alan's friend. That person needs strength right now, and courage. That person needs God's grace, alot alot of it. The problem that is happening right now seems so... insurmountable. It would really be a miracle if that problem is resolved.

I tried to be as detailed as possible without giving details. (eek, sorry, cryptic, i know) That's all i can say / want to say.

If you are willing, please pray for this matter. Please do. It would be pretty devastating if that problem isn't overcomed. (overcome? overcame? )

Do you believe in prayer?

directors. and a moody post.

When i say LOST, what do you first think of?
Jack? Kate? matthew fox? evangeline lilly? Any of the other characters?

Did any of you think of Damen Lindelof? JJ Abrams?
In case you didn't know, they are the directors/producers of the show.


I just watched another episode of One Tree Hill and i realised i really liked it. And i realised that how successful a show is relies heavily on -- not the actors, but the directors!

Being a director is stressful - you gotta decide what camera angle you want the scene shot at / what scenes you want in what order / what background music/sounds you want to have at each scene (a very very crucial part) / what voiceovers you want (e.g. narrator, such as in OTH), and what will be said in those narrative parts.
you gotta decide how you want each actor and actress to look and feel. All the little movements, hand gestures, all have to be pictured and imagined in your mind.

I believe one of the reasons why shows like LOST and One Tree Hill are pretty successful is because of their talented directors. For example, just for the premiere episode of Season 1 of LOST - if you remembered, it started with Jack lying on the floor in the forest, and the camera right at his eye.
After watching some interviews with the directors, i learnt that there were actually other variations, such as jack standing upright in a tree, then gaining consciousness and seeing the dog, etc.

For One Tree Hill, it's even harder - every episode starts and ends with someone talking, in a very crisp, emo-sounding voice, with pauses at appropriate places for dramatic effect, and the scene changes accordingly for maximum effect.

The scriptwriters must be praised then, having to choose appropriate words to use for each episode. It's really really cool how they fit what they have to say to what scenes they show.

All hail the directors.


On a different note.
Feeling a little moody suddenly, just today. Don't know whether it's seeing other people being moody that led to this. Or whether it's the sudden wave of nostalgia, the recollection of sweet memories. That's the sad thing about memories -- they're in the past. You wish you could have them back.. but you know you can't.

Don't know whether it's the realisation that i have 2 months left before i embark on yet another tedious and long year of studying. And the approaching of yet another major exam which i'll have to mug my ass off. The period where i wake up and the first thing i think of is not what i'm having for breakfast but what i'm going to study that day.
Don't know whether it's thinking of the Oral Presentation that i have in several weeks time, and knowing that i'll be nervous and i hate speaking in front of groups but having to force myself to.

Don't know whether it's losing 2 consecutive games of dota against people i have always won against. Don't know whether it's because i was surprised when halfway through playing i suddenly didn't feel like playing and started wondering about all these, when dota usually occupied my mind totally.

Don't know whether it's thinking of friends and wishing i could spend more time with them, just to talk. Just to talk about fun, carefree things. not about when their next paper is, or where they plan to study later on.

Don't know whether it's savouring the moment when i have no stresses - not worrying about the next test, the next exam, the next assignment -- and realising that the moment is limited, it will end. And when that ends, everything i was enjoying not doing would return. Everything that weighed me down and burdened my mind would return.

Don't know whether it's wondering how a certain friend felt about poor results. Wondering what life would be like without that person next year if she couldn't get promoted. Wondering how bad she felt, and how to make her feel better, trying to, and then getting dejected because of failing to do so.

Don't know whether it's not playing basketball after watching some inspiring basketball yesterday, and knowing that i will never be able to play like that even though i try. Whether i will be able to remain fit and healthy even when i dont exercise and sit around all day like a bum. Whether i will be able to gain weight and get a bigger body.

I really don't know. and i can keep going on about what i wonder is making me moody. but i guess it would just make me feel worse. Uncertainty. the worse thing you can have, the trait that destroys your confidence, that puts the stutter in your speech, that puts the hesitation in your actions, that damper in your step.

I miss that moment. I really do.

I think i got it.

gaming is good.

finally.. after ONE ENTIRE WEEK. blogger finally unlocked my blog!













Here's their email of 'apology'

Hello,

Your blog has been reviewed, verified, and cleared for regular use so that
it will no longer appear as potential spam. If you sign out of Blogger and
sign back in again, you should be able to post as normal. Thanks for your
patience, and we apologize for any inconvenience this has caused.

Sincerely,
The Blogger Team

~~~~~

roar. lock my blog for 1 week for no reason. stupid noob spam bot.

Anyway. I hope you all have started watching prison break! for one, i know christabel is mad over PB now (probably more mad over sara-scofield), joining the elite of those who have watched pb. :)
It is a REALLY good show, the excitement is just so gripping and awesome.

All you people who havent watched s2.. go and watch la!! i dunno why you want to wait till the whole season come out. by then you'll be so outdated. ha.
and all those noobs who follow mediacorp PB.. it's ok!!! you'll get there eventually! i watch it every week too ! rawwkZz.


hehe. i got back 90% of my results already. well, besides Econs, i roughly know the rest of my results. ok, i KNOW the rest of my results. Here they are, and if i remember my CommonTest marks for them, i'll compare:


JC1 PROMOTIONAL EXAMS MARKS~~~
H2 subjects
Mathematics --- A (87%!!! ) [best improvement ^_^ i got 46% for CT)
Physics --- A (84%! ) [improve quite abit too, if i'm not wrong i got low seventys for CT]
Chemistry --- B (66.5%) [bleahz. drop. but then, balance up with CT and CA marks, my overall grade is an A, 70.5% :) ]

H1 subjects
Chinese --- B (cant remember what %. same grade as CT)
GP --- B (66.5%) [if i'm not wrong i got top in class =X hahahah. i have no idea how. there's these two girls in class who are like the GP queens. Their essays usually average 40+. Then this time both of their essays below 30, and mine is 33. lol]
Economics --- dunno but i hope i get at least B.
~~~


Woot. overall happy with my results of course. and the funny thing is 3 weeks before my exams i stopped playing dota -- then i resumed 3 days before my first paper, and played everyday since then. I also watched prisonbreak during my exams. The entire season 1 plus whatever has been showed of season 2.
=)
And i still get so good results =X thank god man. ha.

my friends all scolding me sia. super funny.
"Eh alan you idiot!! play so much dota still can get so good!"
"you secret mugger!! "
"Eh you use bot and play dota one right. then got scripted responses.. like if i never stun the guy long enough your bot will automatically say 'hey you noob' "
"eh let's examine alan's script maybe can find marks to minus"
"ee biased marking la"

hahahahhaa

ownage. ^_^

bottom line is -- computer games are NOT detrimental to studies, as I HAVE PROVEN. so parents and teachers and principals who still think so.. send them to me. :p
What matters is good time management. for example i made sure i studied first before i went to play dota. And i already planned well a few weeks before my exams how i'm going to study so i can finish syllabus.
Gaming is good.

I'm a living testimony :p

the post on the temp blog.

Wth la?? They locked my blog. the spam bot is noob.
I'll use this as a temporary blog for the moment.. i've already sent msg to blogger like 10 times.


they better unlock my other blog!!


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*written on oct 6th*
anyway. ha my birthday was yesterdayin case you didn't know. which you probably didn't if you didn't wish me. :) oh well.
thanks to all those who did! sms and personally and online and whatever means. thanks!



Sooooo. now my exams are over!! super free. first time i'm coming home and NOT thinking about what i have to study today. i love this feeling.


Went to have lunch with my class.. well.. 1/3 of it.

retarded people tying themselves to the mrt pole with their ties

ditto

kinda wanted to do more.. besides eat at BK. but then.. everyone wanted to go off.. so dont have. zz. wanted to watch movie or pool or sth. i mean, it's after exams!! and it's my bday!!
anw, went home to play dota with some clasmates+danny-eel.


spam you with pictures:

on my school cafe table. cutlerIES eh. speak good english campaign fail.

for my birthday my mom ordered from pizza hut :)

some chicken thing that was on offer

chicken supreme that wasn't very supreme. anyone knows what's the black thing? i was afraid to eat it at first but when i did it was slightly minty

Mmmm. Yummy drumlets :D

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Written on 10th Oct:

Whee i'm a happy person. got so many presents!
Quite funny ah, cos you know my MSN list have alot of people from my OG group back in JC Orientation.. then it's grouped according to birthdays. Then i see one by one their nicks all put their birthday like '6th Oct.. a special day' ... or '4th Oct' in personal msg. So bu yao lian la!! aha. so i resisted the temptation to do so. :p
and still, had some people wish me :) yay.


ok i wanna take pictures of my presents. probably not alot compared to some people.. but still. it's the most for me i think

From verlene and vivian! haha damn cute la. it's a penguin! ^^



from cheryl jie!
haha yknow some people may get insulted if you give perfume/deodorant cos they think the present-giver thinks they're smelly or sth. haha. but not me, cos
1) my jie won't insult me like that one <3
2) It's super useful since i play sports and so it can help me smell better after i play sports :)
She also gave this cute little horse that is attached to my bag now. It makes a noisy neighing sound 3 times when you squeeze it. i didn't know and i squeezed it during sundayschoolclass.. =X

From joanne. a nice long letter and a little keychain thingy + kitkat.



A ... massager. haha. i thought it was the drumstick thing.. the padded ball which you play on the cymbals. but then YVONNE said it was a massager. supposedly quite comfortable. haha.
yvonne rocks. she has never missed a birthday present since she knew me :D



And... this is from Raylia! hahaha damn funny la she.. 'happy birthday! 16!'
alan: eh i'm not 16 leh
raylia : - stares at me for 3 seconds- OH NO! -starts jumping up and down-
haha super cute.
anyway inside the cd is a super emo song 'Hero-Mariah Carey' which i'm supposed to play while reading her letter which was like a powerpoint with some pictures and quite long one , alot of words. and it was super sweet la!!



Christabel gave me a treat, and gabs treated me to cafe cartel!

He treated me to cafe cartel meal! expensive you know! haha and he super funny want to protect image of being ... 'thrifty' (like dont wanna pay on dates. :p ) or dunno what.. he like didnt even let me know he paid for me, and i only knew when i went to pay joel then he told me gabs paid already. =X thanks gabss!!!

oh and jesslyn said she would get me a present too. and raylia said the cd was just part 1 of 3 presents. haha. rawks. =D

byee. i'm a happy man. and they better unlock my other blog.

michael jackson spoof

ok, before you watch the 2nd video, you need to watch the original one to fully appreciate.

this first video is the michael Jackson MTV Thriller. Basically michael being chased by zombies then suddenly they all start dancing. haha. it's an actual MTV la. if i'm not wrong one of the first MTVs to actually make it like a 'story'. The dance is super well choreographed too.






Then this next one is a spoof of it.. it's SUPER funny la that guy is damn spastic. haha. enjoy. :)

llala.

chem paper tmr. woo. somehow i feel quite confident though i studied probably a total of 2 hours today and spent the rest of the day on the com.
overconfidence?
complacency?

oh well.
gg to me if my brain freezes



lifted off pam's blog:
"u can give the wings to butter instead.
then u'll have a butterfly. ha ha ha.
or bring the wings to mc donalds
then u'll have mc wings. ha
orrr. draw a sketch of them.
.
.
.
and you'll get drawings."

champion ^_^
then u'll have drawings. HAHAH.

sealed

Let you down
i am more on rest, eat, o r laze.
even studying seems shitty and i don't think having a tantrum should help
everyone does only enough
should' nt they?
look, i know enough means enough
and noone doesn't do only enough
sweet nothings
think we aint never talking
must everyone talk only languages?
i know. everyone has eleven reasons.

sometimes, the answer aint at the back. you have to start from the front.
if none of this makes sense
go figure.